- WHAT IS COACHING AND HOW IS THIS DIFFERENT FROM THERAPY?
Coaching, like therapy, is a relationship co-created by the coach and client, designed to help clients take action towards producing fulfilling results in their lives. Though I do have my master’s degree (MFA in Writing from Vermont College of Fine Arts) and am a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, much of my particular training is gleaned from sources outside academia. All therapists are licensed and credentialed from Masters’ level psychotherapy programs and state licensing agencies. But coaches have lots of flexibility in how they work with clients. For example, a therapist is probably not going to lock a client in a chastity device as a way to harness energy and focus. For example.
Coaching works best with clients who can take in direct interpretation of their thoughts and actions. In other words, I give you directions and you follow them. In establishing those directives, I work with you, listening to you and using what you give me. I combine all techniques and tools in which I have specialty training, including what I learned from a host of mentors in the BDSM and Tantra teachings during the time I was in private practice as a professional Domme for five years.
In general, coaching relies on inquiry and personal discovery to foster a client’s natural awareness, and I provide structure, support, and feedback.
- HOW DID YOU GET INTO COACHING?
I have been interested in the healing arts as a teenager, though not always one to walk a straight and narrow path. My path took me through learning Reiki when I was living in New York City, hypnotherapy, and finally as a professional Dominatrix and Tantra practitioner. Those most recent credentials helped me to realize the power and strength inherent in all of us, and how well-resourced we can be when faced with enormous challenge. It was my job to bring clients to that place of challenge, because in that lies their strength and ability to overcome it. Kink Coaching is the logical extension of these skills, because I love helping people, working with them to promote growth and awareness and an improved life. These are the kinds of people I want to have with me on this planet. So I wish to do my part in creating the world. I love working with people and getting into the heart of the matter, even through the hurts. That’s what Kink Coaching is all about.
- WHAT HAPPENS DURING A COACHING SESSION?
We talk at an agreed upon time, via telephone or video. You bring a situation, be it a problem or an opportunity. I engage you with questions and perspective that encourage reflection and shifts in thinking. I listen deeply and help you to remove barriers. When we work together, ideally longer term than the initial session, we review your experience with the recent assignments I’ve given you, be they writing or other exercises. I may give you new ones. Perhaps there is a reward or sanction to be meted out or reviewed. Each session ends with your commitment to action(s) for you to complete before our next live session.
In our conversation, we look to develop insight and clarity, and from them, the necessary actions or behaviors often become evident. Throughout this process, you are supported and celebrated.
- HOW LONG WILL THIS TAKE?
The duration of coaching depends on a number of variables: how much you want to accomplish, your stage of readiness, and how fast you work. Some people move very quickly, others move more slowly and methodically. There is no right or wrong way, just personal differences. I like to go at the speed of authentic progress, and it’s my job to push your intelligent edge of growth.
Keep in mind that problems that may have been decades in the making likely won’t change in the blink of an eye (or crack of a whip, more appropriately). I invite you to surrender to this process, and see it as deep work, not just a program to do something differently for a short time only to find yourself back in the same place. We’ll be tracing things as far to the root as we can. That’s the way to get to lasting change.
If I feel you are no longer benefiting from working with me, it is time to move on. It’s not my desire to foster a dependency but to encourage you to implement the insights and practices we’ll foster into your life.
- HOW CAN I BE THE BEST COACHING CLIENT?
I love this question. I’m glad you asked.
Coaching is most beneficial when you are:
- open to partnering and willing to be coached
- ready to take action and do things differently than you have in the past
- willing to commit time, energy and finances to make a difference in your life
- WHY WORK WITH ME?
I have a combination of skills and knowledge that is unique and perfectly suited for this work. I’m not for everyone, but neither are you.
I am passionate about using all my powers of creativity, presence, intuition and compassion to help you thrive.
I love what I do, and often keep long term relationships with clients.
I am knowledgeable. While an avid reader and researcher, I don’t shy away from learning outside the books. My clients, especially when I was a professional Dominatrix, taught me worlds, and that’s what I continue to strive to give.
- HOW MUCH DOES IT COST?
Everything begins with a free half-hour conversation once you send in your contact form. See the various packages for programs and costs.
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